Batman is one of the more legendary and well-known figures to emerge from comic books and into the wider popular culture. Everyone knows Batman. He is DC’s poster child, arguably bigger and better than Superman. If we go by box office metrics, that’s certainly the case. If Image Comics had a poster child, it would have to be Spawn. The former Al Simmons, who was killed, made a deal with the devil, and came back to Earth under a twisted deal, now a Hellspawn. Spawn, for short. In the world of comics, mashups happen all the time. So, why wouldn’t Batman and Spawn team up? They officially have three times. All of those have been compiled in Batman/Spawn: The Deluxe Edition. It’s a horrible collection and houses one of the worst comics I’ve ever read in my life.
The Good Batman/Spawn from 1994
Where do I start with this collection of dreadful writing? Maybe I’ll start with the good. As I mentioned, the deluxe edition of Batman/Spawn houses three comics. Two of them were companion pieces written in 1994. One was for DC, called Batman/Spawn: War Devil. The other was for Image and fittingly titled Spawn/Batman. War Devil is legitimately good. It features one of my favorite plot devices where a mysterious real-life incident is given a fictional explanation with dire consequences. In this case, it’s about the missing colony of Roanoke and why exactly it went missing.
The past wants to replicate itself in modern-day Gotham. Things are happening that have already gotten the attention of Batman. The Dark Knight doesn’t fully know the demonic influences working behind the scenes. That’s what has driven Spawn to Gotham. From there we get some typical crossover stuff. A fight between the two characters, a belabored friendship/collaboration to fight a mutual evil. Things get bad, and then they get better. It’s nothing earth-shattering, but it’s highly entertaining. This entry was written by the team of Alan Grant, Chuck Dixon, and Doug Moench, with Klaus Janson as the primary artist.
Chuck Dixon: Unsung Hero
I feel like Dixon never gets enough credit for being such a solid writer. Other names get tossed around like Grant Morrison and Alan Moore, but where’s the love for Chuck? The dude puts out solid material that doesn’t try to push absurd boundaries or be controversial. He constructs solid narratives and makes for good reading. Put him together with Grant and Moench, and you get something totally solid here. And Janson’s artwork is also damn solid too. It’s colorful but still dark. It’s bold and chunky, like the characters and the scenery all have heft to them. Batman and Spawn act like you’d expect them to as well. They’re not happy campers, but they don’t have an ego that puts them above the other in settling the dark matters in front of them.
Then There’s Spawn/Batman
The same can’t be said for the other comic of 1994, Spawn/Batman. And as bad as this is going to be, keep reading because I’m saving the worst for last. Spawn/Batman was written by Frank Miller with artwork by Spawn creator Todd McFarlane. The comic takes place in the same continuity as Miller’s famous The Dark Knight Returns, which partially explains why Batman acts like an inarticulate piece of shit. I completely get Miller’s take on an older Batman being a caustic, bitter, hardened jerk. But why his younger Batman fails to act like the genius detective he is has always bothered me.
Batman’s ego here is big, bold, and moronic. He takes off for New York City because he’s trying to take down an arms and weapons dealer that’s fusing human heads with robotic armor. He happens to run into Spawn. The two beat each other senseless, with Batman calling Spawn “stupid,” “punk,” “slob,” “punk,” “twit,” “stupid,” all in the course of three pages. Miller makes Batman sound like he has some sort of mental fixation on bad insults. And the writing doesn’t get much better from there. The story itself is pretty okay, but Batman is pretty much completely unlikeable. He’s not a badass. He’s just bad. Spawn’s not much better. He’s not unlikeable; he’s just bland.
It’s really to the point that it makes you start to wonder if Miller was ever really talented. Obviously he was, but it still makes you question that. McFarlane’s art is great, though; it’s arguably better than War Devil. McFarlane can be lush and detailed but also artfully minimalist. When he wants to hide details to make certain elements stand out, he does it without things looking bland. It’s the best part of this comic but not enough to save it from being unlikeable. And yet it’s still leagues better than Batman/Spawn (2022).
The Bad Batman/Spawn
Jesus Christ, this is the worst thing I’ve ever read. There is only one redeeming quality. Greg Capullo is fantastic. Almost every panel he draws could be blown up as a poster, and you could admire it. It can be grim, morbid, powerful, stunning, but always gripping. And yet Todd McFarlane of all people finds a way to ruin it. Todd’s doing the writing here, and it feels like he has no idea what he’s doing.
From all I can tell, it seems as if The Court of Owls is trying to bring Spawn into their world to kill Batman. And it seems like doing so is causing universes to merge or something. But no one seems to pay any mind to the universes coming together. How can you tell? Because no one ever stops to ask, “What the fuck is happening around here? There’s something seriously weird going on!” One minute Joker shows up, rips off his face, has a bunch of weird Violator-looking pets, and nothing is ever spoken of it again.
How Did Anyone Think This is Good?
It’s almost like trying to read a dream that’s trying too hard to be a nightmare. The way scenes flow, the lack of any coherent narrative, the unresolved ending; it all adds up to nothing. There’s seemingly nothing at stake to be invested in because nothing makes any sense as to what’s happening and why. It’s ethereal to the point of its own detriment. If you’re going to take two legendary comic book characters, you should be doing more than making them look pretty. That just doesn’t happen here at all. It’s so bad it takes away from the artwork by muddling it with intentionally confusing prose and dialogue.
I have seen fanfiction that was infinitely more interesting and coherent than 2022’s Batman/Spawn. For as much as I criticized Miller’s story for bad character writing, at least the plot was goddamn coherent. With McFarlane, you don’t get any characterization at all, in addition to a shitty, confusing mess. It’s the worst comic I’ve ever read. At least Batman/Spawn: War Devil was a fun story. It’s the only thing truly and consistently enjoyable in this Deluxe Edition collection. The rest can burn in hell alongside Malebolgia.
