Just a classic Sunday in West Hollywood. Circus of Books, located on Santa Monica Blvd, had to deal with a shoplifter. The would-be thief was caught on camera, attempting to make off with a two-and-a-half foot dildo.
The video is pretty hilarious. An apparently inebriated person staggers through the store and tries to “discreetly” snatch up the giant silicone member. After tucking it under their arm, they try to casually wander out of the store with it. It doesn’t appear to be the first time this has happened. The employees are more than ready to chase after the thief. But it didn’t take much for him to give up.
“Drunken hot mess klepto tries to steal our biggest dildo,” Circus of Books said. “But it was way too thick and heavy for the getaway.”
Shortly after, an attendant is seen walking back into the store and returning the giant dildo to its proper place. Honestly, if the thief really wanted it that badly, he could have bought it. That’s right, this ginormous phallus is for sale. The item in question costs a whopping $700. Undoubtedly a perfect addition to any coffee table. Especially if you’re looking for that special conversation piece.
There’s not information as to whether or not West Hollywood police were called over the incident. But given the inebriated swagger of the thief and the efficiency with which the dildo is recovered, it’s possible it wasn’t worth causing a scene.
Perhaps the thief should start small before working up to something bigger.
