In a renaissance of good video game adaptions, it is always shocking when a current entry takes us back to the bad days. You know, the “Max Payne,” “Mortal Kombat 2” era that many of us who lived it would like to forget. Today, we have critically acclaimed adaptions like “The Last of Us” and “Fallout” have given us hope – hope that fans of games can be given proper, engaging renditions fit for the TV and silver screen. Alas, that optimism is diminished greatly with “Borderlands,” a soulless attempt at capturing the vibrant and chaotic first person shooting world on the big screen. It is by no means the travesty that many have claimed, but it also isn’t any good, either. It should be noted that I am a huge fan of the games and carried that hope of zany, bloody, violence lunacy to my viewing. Sadly, none of those things made their way into Eli Roth’s vision, whose game based absence stifles any fun to be had from its fun source material blueprint.
Roth clearly has never played the game, and whatever he did to the original script written by “The Last of Us” Craig Mazin seems to be a major misstep of vanity and overreach. I just cannot imagine Roth – a bizarre, macabre filmmaker who’s best work is done in the darker corners of shock horror – doing a better job at writing an adaption of loud, self aware, cartoonish “Borderlands” than a proven track record of success with Mazin. This is speculation of course, but this final product has been obviously hacked to bits and restructured in a slapdash mess. “Borderlands” is barely fun even when it has some interesting moments, and no amount of star studded casting can make up for what feels and looks like a PS3 era video game adaption. Every set piece that recreates memorable settings from the game are just that; poorly rendered surfaces with little to no artistic vision to them.
That surface level approach applies to everything and everyone in “Borderlands.” It is astonishingly derivative, needlessly retreading familiar genre narratives like “Guardians of the Galaxy” without any of the enduring sincerity or endearing characters. It’s all just worse versions of things we’ve seen before, with Roth clearly out of his element in every single facet of filmmaking. He’s not only stifled by his own limitations of his lack of understanding of the source material, but also by the PG-13 rating – a baffling choice that removes everything that makes “Borderlands” so much fun in the first place. The game has plenty of its own stories to mine narratives from, and is primarily focused on wacky gun variations and even wackier characters. It is big and loud and chaotic, all things that CAN be adapted to fit the big screen in more capable hands. But most importantly, the games are fun. Wholly self-aware of its own worlds, packed with pop culture references and wild characters that all breath life into the cartoonish artistry of the planets.
Roth removes all of that, opting to avoid as much fun at any cost. Sure, there’s attempts from the cast to be funny and once in a while they succeed, but everything in “Borderlands” feels muted and dialed back instead turned up to 11. Kevin Hart as Roland was always a baffling choice for fans of the series, but it’s actually worse in practice because he’s not even operating at full Hart speed. He seems as confused to be here as we are to see him, and the character is so undercooked that he could be played by anyone. Cate Blanchett as Lilith is servicable, bringing her veteran chops to a role that frankly doesn’t deserve someone of her caliber. Ariana Greenblatt as Tiny Tina is actually solid casting and has some moments to shine, but never enough to really learn how fun of a character Tina can and should actually be. Jack Black as the voice of Claptrap is the only one who understood the assignment, injecting the much needed humor and being as close to his video game counterpart as anyone. “Borderlands” also stars Jamie Lee Curtis, Édgar Ramírez (another wild miscast), Florian Munteanu, and Gina Gershon.
“Borderlands” is a $120 million film that has the visuals of a first generation iPhone. There are some reprehensible VFX and shot compositions, again, a testament to how wrong Roth turned out to be for the writing and directing duties of “Borderlands.” I know it sounds like I do, but I didn’t actually hate the film. Its brief moments of success are enough to see it through, and I’ve seen enough worst of video game adaptions to know that this is not nearly as bad as it gets. But it also just isn’t good, forgettable and uninspired on every level. It’s the kind of film you watch once, forget within a day, and probably not even sit through when it inevitably shows up on TNT.
“Borderlands” has all the potential to be a fun, wild ride, but instead leaves you with very little to take home with you afterwards. It has so little to say for itself I didn’t even feel the need to give you a synopsis. What this film is about simply doesn’t matter, because it’s a hodgepodge collection of better films you’ve seen before, and you’ll most likely lose interest in why anything is happening fairly quickly.
You’re better off catching “Borderlands” on cable, where it’s better served being half watched while you doomscroll.
Claptrap innocent.
Rating: 2 out of 5 Stars
“Borderlands” is now playing in theaters. You can watch the trailer below.
