Alaskan Woman Attacked By Bear While Using Outhouse

Reality’s continued efforts to prove that truth is indeed stranger than fiction have proven successful, as an Alaskan woman was attacked by a bear while attempting to use the outdoor facilities.

In what could possibly best be described as a case of un-bear-ably bad luck, on February 13th, Shannon Stevens, her brother, and his girlfriend were snowmobiling in Southeast Alaska to spend some time at the brother’s yurt. For those unfamiliar with a yurt, it’s a round, tent-like structure historically used by nomadic tribes due to its relative ease of assembly and portability.

As one would expect, a yurt has a lack of indoor plumbing, necessitating the use of a separate structure for heeding the call of nature. As Shannon went to answer said call, nature answered back when she felt a bite to her bare bottom. Fortunately, she escaped a grizzly fate as the damage from the bite didn’t require immediate medical attention.

Wanting to know what bit her, her brother decided to investigate the outhouse hole. According to an interview with the AP, he was anticipating finding a small animal nesting there. What he discovered was the polar opposite however, as he lifted the toilet seat to see a bear staring back at him.

The AP also went on to speak with biologist Carl Koch from the Alaska Department of Fish and Game Wildlife Management. According to Koch, the relative area of Haines, where the attack happened, has recently seen in uptick in bear behavior. Koch attributes this possibly to a lack of salmon runs and berry growth this year. He also suspects that it wasn’t actually a bite that Shannon experienced, but the bear swiping at her with his paw.

Ultimately, Shannon made it out of this crappy situation with minimal injury. One could say her tale is a lesson that bear claws can do more than just damage your waist line and blood sugar. As for the bear, it may have moved on from the location based on the tracks seen surrounding the outhouse. And one could also say that based off these events, Winnie is now not the only bear to be very closely associated with Poo-h.