If the world of science-fiction, superheroes, and “Fallout” have taught us anything, it’s that radiation can do everything from bestowing superpowers upon people, to altering the fabric of reality. If real-life has taught us anything though, it’s that radiation is generally incredibly bad for you and you should stay as far away from it as possible. That’s why the FDA has issued a warning not to shrimp that was sold at Walmart across several states. Yes, that’s right, we hope you had radioactive shrimp on your 2025 bingo card, because it’s happening.
The good news, if there can bbe any with radioactive shrimp, is that none of the samples that test positive have entered the United States food supply. However, the risk is still concerning enough that the Food and Drug Administration has recommended not to eat it and just throw it away. The food may be contaminated with Cesium137. It’s an isotope that is commonly found as a result of nuclear fusion; why it’s winding up in Walmart shrimp though…. That’s a good question that we don’t have an answer for.
The shrimp in question is Walmarts own Great Value brand and were sold in Alabama, Arkansas, Florida, Georgia, Kentucky, Louisiana, Missouri, Mississippi, Ohio, Oklahoma, Pennsylvania, Texas and West Virginia. The other “good” news so to say, is that the amount that was detected in the samples was low enough to where it doesn’t pose an immediate health risk. The FDA website states that the primary concern is how this could add to people’s long term exposure. So if you’ve already eaten some, they do recommend talking to your doctor, but you’re likely not in immediate danger. Or at least definitely not in danger of becoming Shrimp Man with mutant shrimp powers.
Is it time for us to stop living in the objectively worst time line yet.
